The Animals’ Beef

We humans complain often
About this dreadful state.
Well, animals have cautioned
Of joylessness to date.

I went for some critiquing
and met some to discuss.
And generally speaking
They all made quite the fuss.

Beginning with the dog’s strife,
he told me angrily:
Well, I’m living a dog’s life!
See, no one gives me meat.

I started going vegan,
But that was of no use,
It got worse every season,
Now veggies have no juice.

Up next I asked the house cat,
she sang this elegy:
this milk’s a great deal too flat
with all the fat they keep.

To live I need enough chow,
But well, that’s hopeless too,
The mice are famished too now,
What only should I do?

And plus, I feel so abused,
I’m often chased in hunts,
And they just wish I’d be used
To be the game’s real brunt.

This third new Russian winter
Comes at tremendous speed,
there’s all these gloves of pure fur
That Germans really need.

The horse had just complaints now:
There’s no more gas at all
And now in my restraints, how
I lug the largest hauls.

I never get no oats more
The whip’s what propels me.
As if that’s what I’ve asked for,
As if that’s all I need.

The flea was full of new stress:
I fear that I’m all strife.
These humans are all bloodless,
The war takes too much life.

I went to Mister Lion,
he growled with vehemence;
The raccoon’s got to dial in,
Compete with human gents.

Hyenas and the jackal,
they’re full of jealousy,
like acolytes ramshackle
with this humanity.

Even the moths in clothing
Could not be worry free;
There’s no more wool for coping
And way too many screams!

A dung beetle was cheering,
He told me on the street:
I’m never one for jeering,
But right now’s pretty neat.

I’ve got to praise these times now,
He told me well at ease,
As filth swims at the top proud
And rules, sweet victory.